I will never get out of trouble, no matter what I do, it feels.

People are being pointless arguing I burned out in school though they knew they were bad and wasted time and gave us busywork, which I was up doing past midnight, like, every school night since, like, age 12?  When it was just about reading and things, I was, like, the 99th percentile in the nation, at least in some things.  It was overall the memory of a 3 ring circus with no critical thinking and not enough "lecturing" and "reading" other than things like a lot of African American literature and mentally unstable literature, in higher grades.  What comes next?  Lectures and reading, like a long line of bottles to cap, with no redeeming qualities and alluring background from which to draw.  I've had it!  I'm older.  I have to succeed in my career, playing classical music.